I'm Many Things
by ThatCoolKidSpardel
Summary: Everyone thinks Fitz shows up to take Clare away from Eli...but what if it's the other way around?  Tell me in reviews if you think I should change the rating, I don't think it's to M quite yet but tell me if you think so.
1. Chapter 1

The door slammed in my face and I cussed at the wooden frame.

I turned around and walked away from my house, or my old house. My mother had made it clear that she didn't want to see my face in her home again.

Not that I was so keen on living with her again, but it would've been better than juvie.

Right now I just want to get out of the rain.

I could call Bianca, or Owen, sure, but…

Why should I?

They're not my friends; they're more like my drinking buddies, the people I'll meet at the ravine so we can get high together.

Shockingly, I don't wanna drink or smoke weed right now. I just…I just wanna get out of the rain.

What I really need is a friend, someone I can talk to about all this shit. But I don't have any friends.

Not that that's ever bothered me, its better that way. Have people in your life that can benefit you, but if things get to be too much, don't be afraid to cut your losses and walk away.

I didn't have a strong connection with my family, not that they'd ever made an effort to connect with me either. And the extent of a guy friend to me was someone you would go out drinking with, just to have a good time, never anything heavy.

And girls were for sex. Period.

There was no way I was getting myself bogged down in a relationship, occasional no-strings-attached sex with the only thing I was interested in.

Fortunately I could do that with a lot of girls that hung around the ravine, who had the same intentions as I did.

And girls who didn't put out? I didn't even look at them.

It's not like they could benefit me, no way could I use them to my advantage.

Unless I could use them to hurt someone.

And that's what I had used Clare Edwards for. A weapon.

She has her ways with people; she can work herself into your heart without you even realizing it. And once she's in there, you're stuck. She's got you.

I picked up on this whenever I watched Eli interact with her, I watched his defiant and cocky demeanor fade ever so slightly when he was with her, but still, it faded.

It was a while before I had the idea to ask her to Vegas Night though.

I noticed that whenever I fought with or bullied Adam, Eli would always get involved. He really didn't like it when people messed with his friends; he always stood up for them.

I felt like if I hurt Adam I'd be hurting Eli too, and that was an excellent discovery for me because it meant I could kill two obnoxious birds with one stone.

But it wasn't enough; it wasn't enough to really break Eli. So I went for the person I knew he was closest to, the person I knew he cared about most.

Clare.

The problem with her was that I couldn't just beat her up. She's a girl, and I'm many things, but I'm not the kinda guy that will hit a girl.

So then I got the idea of trying to lure her away from Eli. That would hurt him more than any punch I'd ever thrown him. If I could steal his girlfriend, make him accept that she chose me over him…that would be the final straw; that would destroy him.

So I threatened her into going to Vegas Night with me, and I told Eli I was planning on having sex with her.

I figured I would end up doing just that, I could be a pretty persuasive guy. And I don't mean that I would've raped her, but let's just say I'm not above at least pressuring.

I would touch her for a little while and make her like it so much that she'd beg me to take her, and I wouldn't hesitate to agree. And Eli would hear all about it, I'd make sure of that.

That was the plan.

But that was before I knew Clare Edwards; I knew how….good, how kind…how…amazing she was.

Suddenly hurting Eli wasn't the only thing on my mind when I looked at her…I liked her.

And it scared the living shit out of me.

Before she got ready for Vegas Night, she met me outside of the school. I'll never forget what she told me.

"_Look Fitz, I know you Eli and Adam have had your problems, but I'm really hoping that tonight it can all just blow over. You know I have feelings for Eli, but in all honesty I wouldn't really mind going with you as just a friend, if Eli wasn't in the picture that is. I mean, I know I'm going with you tonight because…well, you know why. But I wish it didn't have to be like this. I feel like if you and Eli could just put all of this aside the four of us could actually become friends. You're a bully Fitz, and that's not good. But there is something good about you, and I hope Eli will see that and end this. And more importantly, I hope you'll see that."_

Her words knocked my feet out from under me. Was she actually telling me that…she wanted to be my friend, she didn't hate me; she…had faith in me?

No one had ever had faith in me ever before and…it was a really nice change.

I cussed myself out for thinking and feeling the way I did but…the damage was done.

I liked Clare. I even bought her a damn corsage.

And I could've had her too. I had her in my grasp.

She was pissed at Eli for slipping me the epikack, and it seemed like she'd ended things with him.

She came to my locker and found me, checking on me. She said Eli was just a wannabe bad ass and she shouldn't have fallen for him. I could've agreed with her, and left it at that. I could've acted like gentlemen and then maybe she would've fallen for me like how I did for her.

But that's just not who I am.

I showed her the knife, I made my intentions clear. I pretended to stab Eli, I scared the piss out of him, literally.

And then I went to juvie, which brings me back to where I am right now.

Standing in the rain in front of Clare Edwards' house. The girl I should've taken back when I had the chance.

But I know I'll never be the boyfriend she's after, so I'll just have to force myself on her.

Make Eli hurt for sending me to juvie, and make her hurt for making me fall for her.

But I wasn't the kind of guy that fell for long, no, I always got back up.

I'm violent by nature and I'm not so much proud or ashamed of it as much as I just accept it.

I didn't whip out the knife because I have no self control, I knew exactly what I was doing.

I wanted to scare him, hurt him, see the fear in his eyes it's what I thrived on, it stimulated me, it…

The rain beat harder on my back and my train of thought was broken.

I walked knocked on Clare's door. I know exactly what I'm doing.


	2. Chapter 2

She opened the door and I almost did a double take. Fuck, why does she have to be so damn beautiful?

"Fitz?" She exclaimed, dropping her phone.

She looked startled, scared, but it only made her more attractive to me. The fear others have for me is what I thrive on. It's one of the only emotions I've ever gotten from people, so I guess my mind just makes due with what it has, and that's why I love the fear so much. I pushed the thoughts out of my head as I stepped into Clare's house, shutting the door behind me.

"Clare." I croaked. I'd lost my voice from being in the cold rain so long, and I started coughing.

She just stared at me for a moment, completely astonished, before she timidly asked "Are you okay?"

I looked at her, utterly dumbfounded. After all I did to her and her boyfriend, and she's asking me if I'm okay. If she knew what I was planning to do to her, would she still be asking me this?

I couldn't take it anymore; I leaned in to kiss her, grabbing her hair in my hands.

She pushed back hard on my chest, and I pulled back for a moment.

"Fitz, what are you doing?" She exclaimed, trying to push me away but I grabbed her hands and pulled her back.

This time when she tried to push me away I grabbed her hands and pinned them above her head, kissing her again, more roughly this time.

She kneed me in the groin and I groaned and let go of her.

She knelt to the floor and was about to grab the phone but I recovered and tackled her, holding her down with my weight.

"This will go a lot smoother if you don't make me angry." I muttered bitterly, and kissed her again.

"Fitz, please stop it!" She said forcefully, still trying to push me away.

"You don't have to fight me you know." I purred and put my hands under her shirt.

"STOP IT!" She yelled, squirming underneath me. I was almost startled by the volume she used.

She managed to turn her body and grab the phone. "Eli, Eli help me!" She screamed into the phone.

I grinned wickedly. Eli's coming, that'll make this even better…_so _much better. He'll get to see her right after I'm done with her, and it'll destroy him.

I started taking off my clothes while still managing to hold her down.

"Fitz…" I looked down at her, she was crying.

"Please don't do this." She begged. "Please." I had to look away, seeing her face was too painful.

As I began to undress her she started crying so loudly I was almost appalled none of her neighbors had come over to see what was going on.

She sounded miserable, forlorn, but her body wasn't fighting. She's realized that I'm stronger, that she can't fight me off.

"Will you at least be gentle?" She sobbed quietly.

That did it.

I got up and handed her back her clothes.

She stared at me dumbfounded as I got dressed.

"Just put your fucking clothes back on before I change my mind." I spat angrily, and before she could say anything I was gone.

I stomped my way down her driveway, feeling disgusted. I'm disgusted with myself for the obvious reasons of course, the fact that I was about to rape possibly the nicest girl in the entire world when she'd been nothing but nice to me.

And also, the sick part of my brain was disgusted with the rest of me for not going through with it. I fell for her again, I took one look at her face, heard her voice, and I completely lost it.

I'm weak. And that won't work for me.

_Juvie should've made me strong; it should've made me invincible to human emotion. So why am I not?_

I was so consumed in my thoughts that I didn't even hear the car screech to a stop behind me, but the next thing I knew I was on the ground.

"Did you do it?" I heard Eli's voice growl.

"Do what?" I said slowly, turning over onto my stomach so I could see his face. He looked angrier than I'd ever seen him before, the look in his eyes was burning with hate and maliciousness; he looks like he wants to kill me.

"Did you rape Clare?"

I shook my head. "No, almost, but no."

_Punch._

"Almost? What the fuck is almost?" He shouted, pulling me to my feet.

"Let's just say I probably got farther than you ever did." I teased, and then I was back on the ground.

"I am going to fucking KILL you!" He screamed, and he punched me in the face so hard he probably broke my nose.

But I just laughed.

Because this is what I thrive on, this is who I am.

"Oh really, emo boy?"

I stood up so fast I startled both of us and then I pulled him up with me.

"And what if I kill you first?"

"I won't rest until you are fucking burning in hell. How could you do that to Clare, how could-…?"

I kicked him in the crotch and he fell over, holding himself with a loud groan.

"You're fucking pathetic. I actually feel bad for Clare."

He stood up and staggered towards me. "What does that mean?"

"Maybe I should've gone through with it, Clare would've probably enjoyed it more than anything she'll ever have with you."

He raised his fist but I was faster, I punched him and connected with his jawbone, hearing a snap, but I wasn't done.

I punched him in the gut, he fell over.

I got down on the ground next to him, so close I could feel his breath on my face.

"You think you can kill me? Like you could ever fight me off you little bitch." I whispered.

"Get up!" I shouted, kicking him in the groin again. He swung his arm for my face but I caught it, punching him again.

He stared at me, defiantly.

"You're not even scared?"

He shook his head and glared. "It takes a lot more than a douche bag like you to scare me."

I smiled.

My second favorite emotion to receive: defiance. Eli's cockiness, his attitude…it's what pissed me off the most about him. But it's also what drew me to him, what drew me to mess with him the first place. It takes a lot for him to break, but that's a challenge I readily accept.

"Oh yeah, what does it take?" I asked, shoving him so his back was against a tree.

"Answer me!" I shouted, lifting him up so his feet were off the ground.

He spit in my face.

"Something you don't have tough guy." He growled, smirking defiantly again.

I couldn't look at that face for another second, I tore my eyes away in anger and looked down. And that's when I saw it.

Eli….was _hard_.

I stared up at him with intrigue. Could it be…?

"What are you-.." He began to ask but I cut him off, crashing my lips into his.

He didn't fight back for a moment and I dominated his mouth with my tongue, but then he seemed to snap back into reality and he grabbed the back of my head and pulled me away.

"What is wrong with you? You're….you're crazy!" He shouted.

I looked up at his eyes and saw what I was looking for.

Confusion.

Lust.

And FEAR.

I scared him.

I broke Elijah Goldsworthy.


End file.
